Sunday 20 May 2012

A Letter To A Religious Nation


I have thought long and hard about whether or not to write a blog on the subject this blog entails. The large quote from the writer and dramatist Douglas Adams I include below goes some way to highlighting both my initial doubt and subsequent decision to write upon the subject of religion. Before I begin however, read and enjoy this fantastic quote:

“Religion . . . has certain ideas at the heart of it which we call sacred or holy or whatever. What it means is, 'Here is an idea or a notion that you're not allowed to say anything bad about; you're just not. Why not? – because you're not!' If somebody votes for a party that you don't agree with, you're free to argue about it as much as you like; everybody will have an argument but nobody feels aggrieved by it. If somebody thinks taxes should go up or down you are free to have an argument about it. But on the other hand if somebody says 'I mustn't move a light switch on a Saturday', you say, 'I respect that'. Why should it be that it's perfectly legitimate to support the Labour party or the Conservative party, Republicans or Democrats, this model of economics versus that, Macintosh instead of Windows - but to have an opinion about how the Universe began, about who created the Universe ... no, that's holy? ... We are used to not challenging religious ideas but it's very interesting how much of a furore Richard [Dawkins] creates when he does it! Everybody gets absolutely frantic about it because you're not allowed to say these things. Yet when you look at it rationally there is no reason why those ideas shouldn't be as open to debate as any other, except that we have agreed somehow between us that they shouldn't be.”

          I am an Atheist, and although I do not spend my days knocking on doors preaching (I choose the word advisedly) my non-beliefs and forcing others to adopt them for their own, I admit I am not entirely silent in publically airing them. And why should I? Religion is, somehow, the default position society finds itself in. Someone writes a tweet exclaiming their love for Jesus, someone else walks around with a Jesus tattoo adorning their arm, no one says a word. Someone writes a tweet exclaiming their non-belief or walks around wearing a t-shirt saying “God Does Not Exist” (which I don’t by the way) and society looks down upon them and berates them for expressing their thoughts. Something which, wrongly, does not occur in the opposite sense.
          I don’t believe in the existence of God, I also cannot see how religion is a force for good in the world. People claiming the Bible contains a blueprint for a successful moral compass have clearly not read it. There are countless examples in the Bible of tales that if we were to adopt them as morality guidelines, society as we know it would fall into disrepute. There is a rather large passage of writing by Professor Richard Dawkins in which he works his way through dismantling each and every one of the ten commandments. It is too long to reproduce here but I will give you a short snippet:

“Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy": this commandment is regarded as so important that a man caught gathering sticks on the Sabbath was summarily stoned to death by the whole community, on direct orders from God.

          This in turn goes on to explain how the ten commandments lay no orders against rape, torture or the selling of one’s own children; acts that are rife during the time in which the bible stories allegedly occurred. We can only presume that God was fine with these things happening as long as everybody worshipped him and no one else. Of course, anything other than that would be barbaric.
          My final quote comes from, as ever, the eternally erudite Mr. Christopher Hitchens, the late hero of mine. One of his many splendidly phrased anti-theist quotes reads as follows:

“In order to be a Christian, you have to believe that for 98,000 years, our species suffered and died, most of its children dying in childbirth, most other people having a life expectancy of about 25 years, dying of their teeth. Famine, struggle, bitterness, war, suffering, misery, all of that for 98,000 years. Heaven watches this with complete indifference. And then 2000 years ago, thinks "That's enough of that. It's time to intervene," and the best way to do this would be by condemning someone to a human sacrifice somewhere in the less literate parts of the Middle East. Don't let’s appeal to the Chinese, for example, where people can read and study evidence and have a civilization. Let's go to the desert and have another revelation there. This is nonsense. It can't be believed by a thinking person.

          But alas, my aim here is not to berate religion as much as I can, and guiltily love to do. No, it is simply to address this damning of non-believers expressing their opinions. Mentally I am a militant Atheist, publically however I haven’t the platform or the status to express my non-beliefs it seems to a willing public (something which I grasp and many religious people seemingly do not).
          My hatred of religion however isn’t, as some people would refuse to believe, on a personal level. People want to pray, that’s fine and no one including me can stop them even if they wanted to, which I don’t. My opinions are loaded more towards the institutions and central bodies of religion; I have no problem in people believing what they want to believe, I just want to be afforded the opportunity to be able to voice my opinion without getting both barrels every time I do.

Wednesday 16 May 2012

One, Albeit Sad, Positive of Student Life


Quite apart from enjoying the obvious fruits that University has to bear, one perdurable positive about the student lifestyle is, irrevocably and as well as countless others, the opportunity afforded to me to be able to watch whatever films and television programmes I choose to. Even writing that down it sounds sad, but sadly for me it is something that has mutated itself to be rather more important to me than I would have at first given it credit for over the course of the first year. It’s only a very small thing I grant you, but frankly never has it shown its importance more than the way in which it did this weekend.
          Firstly, allow me just engage you in a small amount of scene-setting for those not currently aware of my family arrangement, it’s really not that hard to understand so stick with it. When I’m not at University I live with my Mum, Dad and two younger sisters, (avec the Cat, the Dog and two Guinea Pigs all of which are not strictly, if in any way relevant here). With two younger sisters especially, you can probably imagine the amount of remote control turf-wars that occur on a daily basis, a living room Civil-War if you will. Sometimes, and I stress only sometimes, I will win and the television will play host to some top quality broadcasting of my choice, and sometimes Road Wars.
          On the other occasions, I am sad to say, I lose. Mainly, I must add, this comes as a result of one or both of my sisters appealing to Mum and Dad for help. Well, I say help, I mean “Muuuuum. Daaaaaad. Tell Greg to change the channel.” Trust me; it’s not worth fighting against that, even if you have the time of effort to spare. On these occasions, the television is subjected to a veritable plethora of bum-dribble, the likes of which, I fear, has never been seen (or at least has never been subjected to one human being in one sitting). I talk of course of television ‘talent’ shows.
          Now, it is that this fitting juncture where the point (yes there is a point) of this article comes into play. This weekend I returned home to witness my beloved Manchester City scrape through victorious to lift the Premier League trophy. Quite apart from the fact that I feel that I’ve aged about thirty years over the course of the weekend, my throat is now pretty much non-existent and my heart feels like it could give way any second (although that’s probably as a result of my ‘diet’), that side of my weekend activities probably deserves its own article, alas another story for another time. No, back to the point. This weekend was the final of Britain’s Got Talent. Now normally, living at home, I would know, or at least be aware of, every act in the final. Unashamedly, this would be the result of twitter around the house and other advertised plugs on the television. However, this time around I knew absolutely nothing, and it felt fantastic.
          Living at University meant that I was completely sheltered from the shower of crap that was going on on television. I literally was not in any way aware that Britain’s Got Talent was on, because I had never been subjected to it. During the course of the first year I have missed two runs of Britain’s Got Talent and one run of the X Factor, all the while I will willingly be watching Horrible Histories, Qi, Never Mind the Buzzcocks, That Mitchell and Webb Look and all manner of other programmes chosen by me, for me. For years I have wondered what the secret was for avoiding all mention of these terrible ‘talent’ shows and other dreadful incarnations of pixels that John Logie Baird would be ashamed of. Now, finally, I know the secret: go and get a degree.  

Monday 14 May 2012

Things I Learnt In First Year


After the stresses, strains, trials and tribulations that took place over the course of 2011, thankfully amounting in me being offered at a place at University, it seems ludicrous to be able to say to myself that the end of my first year is just two exams away. The start of my course seemed such a long way off at the time and although, granted, most of the time that I’ve “been at” University I’ve spent at home (thanks to the monstrously long breaks that I do not in any way criticise) I thought it might be quite nice to record some points; some of the things I have learnt during the course of my first year as a student (a couple of which I stole from the web but that are applicable and simultaneously more funny than what I can come up with). Here is a little, hopefully humorous, hopefully relatable, list of things I have learnt:

1.     It is possible to survive the entire day on a piece of toast or a mars bar. Or both. Or neither.

2.     Caffeine is a food group.

3.     Never, ever, ever, refuse free food.

4.     Yes, that is the guy upstairs weeing. Just turn your iPod up and try to ignore it.

5.     The Maintenance man’s door-knock is merely a formality. He will walk in no matter what state you’re in.

6.     If you wake up and your shower head has been changed, the Maintenance man has done it when you were asleep.

7.     Fear the Maintenance man.

8.     Upstairs will make the entire block smell like weed and there’s nothing you can do about it. Just go with it.

9.     People wear onesie’s without a trace of irony. Avoid these people.

10.    Apparently flip-flops are a socially acceptable type of footwear at all times of the year, as long as everything else you’re wearing has Hollister written on it.

11.    Hipsters are a race.

12.    Charity bookshops are dangerous places for book nerds like me.

13.    Reference everything. Reference your name. Reference the date. Reference your tutor’s name. Reference you references.

14.    If it’s a bad lecturer, it’s okay to skip the lecture.

15.    Pre-lecture reading is not compulsory and should be treated as such.

16.    Pre-seminar reading is compulsory and should be treated as such.

17.    Unexpected double-sided reading is about as fun as it sounds.

18.    No matter who tells you otherwise, when a tutor says “this isn’t something that can be done the night before,” it is most definitely a challenge.

19.    Remember that thing? Oh, what was it called? Hang on... Don’t tell me... Oh yeah! Money!

20.    You will take a flyer. There are no other options.